A beautiful gift

I finished the casting over the weekend & couldn't wait to deliver it. I'm sure it was bittersweet for Keenan's family. I took it to them Saturday but was unable to be there for the "unveiling". I'm sure it was touching. I did speak with his mom briefly yesterday. She cried, I cried....what a beautiful gift.

"Thank you for it not being Easter"

Kids are funny. Without them I doubt there would be an America's Funniest Home Videos or chuckles at the dinner table when they're saying the prayer. Jordan, my 4 year old, always wants to say the prayer. He's very good at them, often changing up what he says, which is impressive for only being 4. Since last Sunday, every prayer he says includes how thankful he is for Easter so Dave told him tonight before he started saying the prayer that it wasn't Easter anymore so he didn't need to say anything about it in the hopes he might say something different tonight. He did.

"Dear Heavenly Father......thank you for it not being Easter last night" (everything is last night). I couldn't hold it in. Thankfully he didn't notice & went on to say a beautiful prayer.

Aaah, kids. :)

The County Fair

Yesterday we made our way up to Logandale/Overton for the county fair. I don't know why I thought it'd be all giant belt buckles & 10 gallon hats & bull riding & tractor pulling (all things I do not love, in the least). It was actually fun! The kids had such a great time. There was room to run, rides to ride, games to play & the food....oh, the food!! We spent way more than we should have, but it's not something we do often & the kids enjoyed themselves so much. It was hard to drag them out 6 hours after our arrival.

As a side note, the little boy whose casting I did last week passed away the next day. I feel so badly for the family. The castings came out beautifully. I'll have to take pictures & post them here.

We wound up buying a new computer the other night after ours went ca put. One of the main files was corrupted & it was really old & really slow so we decided to upgrade & work on transferring the files from the old computer to the new one when we get a chance.

My mom called last night when we were getting ready for bed to tell me airline rates were on the way back up & she wanted to book something to come out before that happened. She'll be coming out the first of next month, which I'm glad about. I've missed her, though she was just here in December & January. Babies change so quickly, so she's missed a lot already with Hayleah's development. She missed a lot with both Logan & Jordan, too, & I think she feels badly about that. There's not much she could have done with her health in the state it was in when the two boys were babies. It's hard for grandma's to live far away, I think.

Holding my children closer tonight

Today has been incredibly long. Though I did manage to sleep in until about 8 a.m. (*gasp!*), the rest of the day I've been running around or hurring up & just so I can wait. The breaks, which I had been told at a brake place, on my van needed a major overhaul so I headed to the dealership to get it taken care of. According to the tech's at the dealership, though, I was lied to & almost robbed of the $650 Just Brakes wanted to charge me for the nothing that was wrong. I'm glad I listened to the voice in my head telling me to get another opinion!

While in the waiting room, attempting to be patient while my van was being diagnosed, I received a call from a lady who works for Candle Lighters. I have a memory casting business & I take molds of childrens (mostly babies) hands & feet & cast them with plaster so the parent can have a 3-D image of their child's hand or foot. Anyhow, she said their was a family near me with an 8 y.o. son who has terminal cancer & they want some castings done. I didn't realize at the time how urgent it was. Keenan (the boy with cancer) was very close to leaving this world, according to his mom whom I spoke with later. She wanted to know if I'd still do the molds if he was gone by the time I got there. It was that close to his time. I got in to this business because I believe parents deserve to have something they can touch & feel & hold of their child, whether living or not, that captures the moment. I especially feel it's important for me to do this for parents who have lost their little one, though this was my first terminal child to cast, no matter how hard it is on my tender heart.

I'm amazed at the love & comfort I felt in this home. The family was LDS & there was lots of grandparents & aunts & uncles & children there, surrounding him with their love. Life didn't stop, at that moment, for the rest of the family. There were still things that needed to be done & kids that needed to be given attention & cared for. They all pulled together to do what needed to be done so his mom & dad could spend as much time with their baby for as long as possible.

The Spirit was so strong in this home. Normally, I do the castings & leave. I'm glad they don't take long...I want to leave. In this home, though, I wanted to stay & be with this family. I ended up staying several hours to get the three castings they wanted. I felt at home here....like this was exactly where I should be. There was something very right about the time I was able to spend with them in their home, talking with them & enjoying their company.

My heart is heavy for this family. Though I know Keenan is about to leave this world for some place much better, the pain this family will feel upon his departure weighs on my heart. The thought that that could easily be one of my children makes me so grateful for their health & it makes the love I feel for them burn so much stronger than it did before getting the privledge of meeting this family. Sometimes it takes a glimpse of how it could be to realize how good it already is.

Gossipers & Haters

Last night, while talking with my closest friend Onala, I found out there's a girl who's been talking trash about me. While I'm not so naive to believe no one ever talks about me, the fact that what she had to say was negative & hateful kind of surprised me. I expect others will say I'm odd or that I do things differently, but that I'm a nice person who cares about others & serves others as best she can. This doesn't bother me at all. In fact, I'm proud to say I'm not a "sheep". What really surprised me was that her attack on me was because she disliked me. I can totally understand people thinking I'm a bit nutty for some of my beliefs (natural birth, home birth, home schooling, baby wearing, co-sleeping, etc...), but actually disliking me is rare, I think. Anyone who knows me knows I'm pretty easy going & easy to get along with. I'm a bit reserved because I know many don't have the same belief's as me, but am always willing to help or offer humble advice where there's a need. Overall, I think I'm a good person.

For the sake of anonymity (that's funny...like any one's reading LOL), or maybe because I really can't remember this girl's name, we'll call her Rebecca. I met Rebecca about a year ago at a Stake dinner. She & I got into a bit of an argument about some natural health advice I gave a friend of mine who was sitting at our table & after explaining the science behind it, I determined Rebecca was one of those people who need to be right. I can't even remember what we were in a disagreement over, just that I left that night with a feeling of dislike for this girl who acted like she couldn't possibly be wrong & spoke negatively of people (the Primary kids in particular) in her ward, which happened to be my old ward. I remember she was quick & witty, but cutting in her comments & that she had a comment & opinion about everything. As I said, I quickly figured out she was the type of person that had to "win" in their debates, I told her it was okay that she didn't agree with me & that I didn't have to agree with her either.

I know how pointless it is to argue a point with a close minded person, so I didn't want to go any further. I'm not interested in drama for the sake of drama & I dropped it. I hadn't really thought about it since that night but apparently she's still holding onto it. I feel bad for her because she wastes so much on this dislike for me. And I wonder who else has had to feel her "wrath" when they don't agree with her & say so. She seemed to be a bit of a bully, only having people around her who don't stand up to her. Don't get me wrong....I fully understand not wanting to rock the boat or feel like you don't have it in you to stand up for another person when it means you'll likely get buried in mean spirited quick whit. I feel just as badly for those who are around her & feel like they should hold their tongue for fear of becoming one of those she talks about negatively behind their backs.

What touched me was that my friend was so insulted on my behalf, she left shortly after the comments were made. It made me feel really special that she would stand up for me, in the best way she could. She didn't have the perfect come-back for the nasty remarks at that moment & that's okay. She left, sending a clear message she wanted no part of the bashing that was going on, nor did she appreciate others speaking of her friend in a bad way when they didn't even know her (me). She is the type of person who doesn't do well with confrontation. Like me, it often makes her sick to be in the midst of contention. I'm touched she cares about me enough to silently make a point to that particular group of gossipers. I love my friend. :)